Skydiving

Hey guys...

I went Skydiving today. I was bored and some guys wanted to know if wanted to go. I said sure. I have my jump wings with the USAF so idecided to have some fun. We jumped from 15k feet and went out to outback steakhouse. Yes in that Order. I am here in the good ole USA and well im here and i love it and all, but its like part of me misses protecting freedom in a way. I spoke with the crew today and they said the same thing. We are a military inside a military and i guess that just how it will be. Thats just the way it is. Overall i am happy to be home. Food, Fun, People...and hopefully a official girlfriend one day. Dayum just two weeks ago i was flying in the helo with AliAliAli's picture taped up there laminated to prevent the sand grains from runining it, and today im here at barksdale air force base. I guess i made it out better than most. That was my second tour in Iraq, and my third visit to Afghanistan. I have been in every major conflict known to civilians and some that werent know to civilians. Life can be cruel. People can be harsh. I look at my buddy CAP who is going through rough times now. He has two beautiful babies who love there daddy and he has custody of them now, but there was another kid that wasnt his that he was forced to leave with there mother. Now im not a judgemental person, and hell people make mistakes and act selfish and foolish at times but kids and the elderly need us. They need the people who can do for them. I guess it just sucks to be in position to leave someone. CAP told me today that he feels like he left a airmen behind for the enemy to capture, torture and kill when he had to leave his stepdaughter. Hell while we over there we had our own problems, but back home there are many problems as well. I guess we never thought about it like that. When i think about it, life is like a skydive. In life we must make choices and rely on faith and ourselves to make sure that things come to a positive end, but...Faith is a big one. Hell i was shot with a Flak Jacket on in iraq, stabbed, hit by a bus, dropped in the wrong spot courtesy of the dumb ass officer from westpoint, and shot at on random. I mean i was at apoint where i couldnt go to sleep unless there was gunfire and choas around me. That was the most peaceful sleep. Hell i went out today and i was at the airstrip checking over my chute and everything for the flight when there was a loud bang! It was like POW POW..hell before i knew it i had dove for cover and the whole room of about 30 people were looking at me like WTF is his deal..lol I must admit it was funny, but i guess that iraqnaphobia. The fear of coming home in a body bag. I cant even watch the news. I look at these little snipets of the roads, streets, people that i used to see in iraq with a backround of carnage, violence and pure hell. Why cant we have a form of media that just speaks the truth. One that isnt worried about the awards or anything like that. One that just tells it how it is. Hell Foxnews(www.foxnews.com) aka Al Jazeera are like one in the same. Both tell lies. How many times have they told stories about the schools that were built, the jobs created for women, the houses built for the homeless. Ya know the good stuff. Why must people make money off of death. Death isnt wonderful for anyone regardless of who it is. I look at Rosa Parks. She died and the nation has lost an icon. Back in those days she had to have more than big balls to do what she did. Here in 2005 soon to be 2006 we have so much corruption, so many people fucking up and so many people just doing the wrong thing for the "right" reason. Ya know we only live once! One time. You either can make the best out of it or you can skydive without a parachute. I correspond with some of you that have a generally good life and you have alot too be thankful for, but there are some people who just complain. Complain just to complain. You complain because youre broke and cant go out and buy Kenny Cole Watches or Dooney& Burke purses or whatever you like, and you think that the world has just gone to shit in a handbasket, but when you think about it you actually have it made. You have a family, and if you dont have that you have a baby who adores you and hell you are healthhy for the most part and you have a job...even though you may hate it, someone out there wants your POS job that doesnt pay enough, or you have this car, but who cares that it isnt a 2006 Mercedes Benz 500 series? Hell i am in the USAF and i drive a POS Kia and im happy. i think people take so many things for granted and they dont figure that they can lose them. But im living proof tHat you can. If you arent careful, you can lose them. You can lose it all. That why you have to be thankful for everything that you have in life. Life is full of chances and opportunities and we must all take them.... Everyday is a Skydiving expedition..So the next time you skydive will it be with a parachute or without one?

Funny Clip :D

http://www.big-boys.com/articles/iraqnews.html

http://www.big-boys.com/articles/camelspider.html
I thought you guys should check out this clip :D

I went fishing again yesterday and IGKYAH or Im gonna kick your ass Holli once again put the curse on us and we didnt catch a single dag gum(is that a word) fish.

It was so bad...

Also CAP was awarded Temporary custody of his kids due to his ex wife doing some very nasty things...
Umm if you guys remeber, she was one of the divorce filers while he was in iraq. She also tried to UP his insurance policy to a very very very comfortable amount in the event that he would have been killed. Also when he came back home(she was unaware that he was coming home) he walked into his house to find his wife(soon to be ex wife) well...just doing some things that she shouldnt have been doing on a computer without clothes on. So the divorce is gonna start and i have to get subpoenad to court which will be fun im sure.

Also in other news this morning while going to Grandys, i ran over a rabbit. :( I didnt mean to, but i couldnt avoid him. I stopped to see if he was ok, but he was dead. :/ Well I guess i will talk to you guys a little later..

Fishing

Heya guys...

I went fishing yesterday and it was great. I was there at Cross Lake in a boat with my buddy DH and ahh we were men... RAWR! It was windy, but it died up and down and we drifted to the open part of the lake hoping to catch that "big one", but he only caught one catfish that we let go because Holli insisted that we dont kill the fish. I think that she would have drifted into IKYAH Mode..or im gonna kick your ass Holli mode... if we didnt. IT was kinda funny how she was trying to speak for the fish :/ He was about 4 pounds and we were happy, but he got to live another day thanks to Holli. We also saw some cranes and cool birds like that. We also saw a gator, and there were two beavers who were ummm...well lets just say they wanted a baby. :P
Oh i also ate at chic fil a again and umm umm umm umm umm :> I also had a meeting that was not too good. We may have to go help with the latest hurricane if it gets really bad. I have yet to have any R&R, and for some odd reason i wont take the advice of some of you guys and rest. I am so happy to be home that i just have myself involved in all sorts of activities. I promised Holli, Suz and Mamma that i would get some sleep so please i know that all of you other bloggers can keep a secret, because i havent slept a full 12 hours yet so SHHHHHH. Well i gotta get some sleep. It is 306am and im supposed to be back out on the lake for 6am...

Laters

:|

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,173784,00.html

Apt Things

You guys are great...

I love all of you guys...

I mean i have so many emails wanting to help me with my apartment stuff. Well for starters, i paid a WOMAN(i finally confessed..lol) to decorate my old apartment, and i will have to find one with good decorative skills, and second of all i cant just take you guys things. I am grateful for the gesture which is good, but i dont deserve all of that guys. However maybe i can buy some things from you guys. Either way, i still am in dire need of a female with deocrative skills. She has to have these skills, but remeber that i am a bachelor without kids, and NO PINK ROSES OR DAISES IN THE BATHROOM OR ANY STUFF LIKE THAT.. :D

See ya later...
I have to go and meet CAP and the crew. The B-52 pilots and 8th AF are gonna try to pick us for answers for the upcoming missions in Iraq that they will be flying, and well they wont get anywhere...I'll write back later







Also here is a story about my buddy CWO Weaver who was stationed in IRAQ with me. We trained a bit together, but he didnt make it...the media released his final letter with the approval of his family. We flew in the same bird and did everything the same pretty much. He was just always in the bird. IT coulda beeen me. Thanks for all of your prayers...


The battlefield letter from father to daughter begins: "My Dearest Little Savannah."
Like every soldier at war in Iraq, Army Chief Warrant Officer Aaron Weaver scratched down on paper expressions of love and longing. He wrote about his dreams of the future for his 15-month-old child.
There was a spark of parental insight: "I always knew that having children is special to a parent, but it means so much more than I ever imagined. ... You are the meaning of my life. You make my heart pound with joy and pride. No matter what happens to me or where we go, you will always know that I love you."
The letter was found on Weaver's body when he died Jan. 8, 2004, in the crash of a Black Hawk helicopter shot down by insurgents.
Weaver, 32, joined the roll of U.S. troops who have died in Iraq since the war began in March 2003. On Tuesday, that tally reached 2,000 with the announcement of three more deaths: George T. Alexander Jr., 34, of Killeen, Texas, an Army sergeant who died of wounds at a military hospital; and a Marine and a sailor, both unidentified, killed last week in fighting west of Baghdad.
In recent weeks, the pace of dying has doubled to more than a dozen deaths a week.
Nearly seven of 10 American troops lost were soldiers. There were small numbers of sailors and airmen and one Coast Guardsman. Almost all the others who died were Marines. Forty-three were women. About a quarter were from the National Guard or Reserve.
The letters home, a mix of the plain and poetic, are a poignant legacy of those American dead.
Weaver's letter is today framed and hanging in Savannah's bedroom in Fayetteville, N.C. "I would hope that when she grows up, she knows how much he adored her," says Nancy Weaver, the soldier's widow. Savannah is 3 now.
Scholars who study and collect war correspondence say the letters help bring into focus individual loss. "The overall impact of these letters is that it reminds us of the humanity of these troops and how they are not statistics," says Andrew Carroll, editor of two collections, Behind the Lines and War Letters.
"So that when we look at a number like 2,000, those are 2,000 individual stories of lives lost, every one of them that had enormous potential, and ... 2,000 families that have been impacted as well."
The letters transcend opinion and politics, says Jon Peede, director of Operation Homecoming, a project of the National Endowment for the Arts to collect the writings of men and women at war. "You can be for or against the war, and be moved by these writings," he says.
The letters and e-mails that families shared with USA TODAY begin with "Hi, Princess" or "Hey, Mom," with "Hey, Baby" or "Dear Family." They tell of sandstorms and triple-digit temperatures, the monotony of war and a gnawing desire for home and normalcy.
"Keep your eyes open for a 323 or 325 BMW, 2002 or 2003. That's what I want," Marine Lance Cpl. Deryk Hallal, 24, writes to his parents in Indianapolis, in a letter received on April 3, 2004, "Oh! Send some goodies. Beef jerky and things like that. Tell people at church to keep praying for everyone here."
Often, soldiers and Marines allude to the death tugging at them each day.
"God was with us on all of our patrols," Hallal writes. He was shot and killed in Ramadi on April 6, 2004. It was one of the war's bloodiest months: 135 Americans died.
Carroll says a last letter has the power to re-animate, if only for a moment, those lost. "It draws us into their story," he says. "There is that sense of mystery, of what was that person thinking and what happened to them."

Apt Trashed

Hey guys

I made it from the Airport and i headed to Longview but before i could do that i stopped on the way to visit a cousin who never came so i left her a note. Anyhow... i was on the phone..speeding doing 28 miles over the limit when i saw a cop doing radar and i slowed down and pulled over..

The first thing on my mind was damnn these haundi cars are pretty fast for being a POS. :)

So the officer walks up and here it is...

Ofc: How ya doing... then he spits out copenhagen..
Me: Ok sir and you?
Ofc: Are you in a rush to get somewhere
Me: Well no sir. I have been in iraq for quite a while im im used to driving at speeds of over 70mph to avoid getting blown up my IEDS or getting RPGS shot at me.
Ofc: Oh youre a marine huh?
Me: No sir im a airman
Ofc: So you fly planes huh
Me: No sir, i was a gunner in a pavehawk helicopter.
Ofc: So you like to shoot huh
Me: well when its a matter of life and death yes sir
Ofc: How is it over there
me: starting to get aggravated...i say well its shitty, smelly, lawless and they hate cops and military people.
Ofc: well i say we blow the whole damn place up.
Me: Ok sir
Ofc: I cant remember what i stopped you for?
Me: Speeding
Ofc: oh yeah
Me: Heres my license and registration
Ofc: Ok..oh by the way. Did you see a lot of blood. I cant handle it.. i have a weak stomach
Me: Me. Yes sir. I once saw an iraqi slit a sheeps throat and drink his warm blood with it trickling out of his mouth
Ofc: Thats just sick
Me: well its a way of life. I also saw a
Ofc: Please dont tell me anymore. This officer will need assistance if you do
Me: I am sorry sir for speeding, but i must be at my nearest base soon
Ofc: Well im gonna let you go with a warning
Me: Thank you sir
Ofc: No thank you for not telling me any more stories
Me: Ok have a nice day

LMFAO HAHAHAHAH that was funny as hell

ANyway... I sped on even faster to my destination and made it to my apartment...
It is utter destruction and everything is a total loss. They did however dry my carpet and im sure i will have to sue them to get my money back...

I wonder if i could tell a horror story to my apt complex and they have the officer syndrome :/

ttyl

Day After...

Hey guys...

WOW I got up a 5am, did some push ups and my granny was up and i ate 9 pieces of bacon, two pancakes and grits. She told me it was time for me to get a good woman who can fatten me up..lol Now i have taken a sandfree shower in clean water and im smelling like bodywash and i actually watched the local news. Hmm Strange and yet there is no graphic images of bodies, children, gunfire, rape. Hmm i like that. Also i fly out to Texas today. My apartment was flooded two months ago and my friend told me that everything was destroyed and of course i didnt have renters insurance, and the apt complex wont pay a thing im sure.

Well thats is from American Guy Back From Iraq full of Bacon and Pancakes...
Hmm what will i eat for lunch! How some chicken :D

See ya laters guys

Suprise in Cali

Hey guys, i am back in the good ole USA. I have made it. I left the base in Cali, went to the airport to get a rental car and went to my grannies. I passed Krispy Kreme...ahh and i ate there and i went to burger king, mcdonalds, some place called taco beuno and i drank cold Beer! Well back to my story... i called my granny to see how she was and she thoguht that i was still in iraq and she told me that she was coming back from the mall. Well i raced to her place(i have a key) and i let myself in..and i was like wow! I never thought that i would see this place again...i went to the kitchen and drank a capri sun and then i heard the jingle of the keys.. It was my cousins... They saw someone in the house and they were sacred. I came around the corner and they bum rushed me. I fell over.. Capri Sun hit the ground and my granny walks in and tell them to quit horseplayin around and i get up and she drops her bags and i grab her and hold her and tell her that im home! She cries and she told me that she missed me so much. Well we talked and rekindled old times and i got a chance to sneak off and i bought her a ford focus to drive...she will be able to pick it up tomorow. She doesnt know. Its the least that i could do for her, and i paid the insurance up for a year! Well i gotta go..talk to you guys later

Going Home Again

Hey guys,

I leave for Germany in 2+ hours...
I couldnt have made it without Holli,Erin,Suz,Amber,Haley,Cassey,K,Kelli belly,Angela and my family and friends. I wish that i would have blogged earlier...oh shit and kikimiki or whatever her name is... she helped me actually deal with the period thing... acumakikik or something like that..oh and Mamma! She was helpful...you guys were the best... I love you all!

I am going home... I will suprise my grandma..i hope she can take it...
I have been shot(via flak vest) stabbed, fought, bombed, mortared, shot with RPGS and im going home with all limbs! When i get to Germany i will have a few brews if i can, and i will get someone a computer that needs one. I love you guys... i will mesage ya in Germany...bye

Im leaving this FUCKING HELL HOLE!!!
:D

Landing In Iraq(london)

Hey guys,

This...well..recreation was done by me with the approval of my good buddie in 3 doors down, but i feel like it represents me, and yes there are times when i dont think i'll make it through with some of the things that i do, but i have made it once again tonite with another close call. Its a lil too close for comfort when im so close to getting back home, but heres the song first.




I woke up today in Iraq As the plane was touching down And all I could think about was monday And maybe ill be back around If this keeps me away much longerI dont know what i will do Youve got to understand its a hard life That im going through And when the night falls in around meI dont think ill make it through Ill use your light to guide the way Cause all I think about is you Well Baghdad is getting kinda crazy And the Sunni Triangle is getting kinda cold I keep my head from geting lazy I just cant wait to get back h ome And all these days i spend awayIll make up for this i swear I need your love to hold me up When its all too much to bear And when the night falls in around me I dont think ill make it through Ill use your light to guide the way Cause all I think about is you And all these days i spend away Ill make up for this i swear I need your love to hold me up When its all too much to bear When the night falls in around me I dont think ill make it through Ill use your light to guide the way Cause all I think about is you
And all these days i spend away Ill make up for this i swear I need your love to hold me up When its all too much to bear When the night falls in around meI dont think ill make it throughIll use your light to guide the wayCause all I think about is you.

Well thats how i feel everyday. I know that i could be gone in a split second. I trust...Trust in the faith that i have everyday. I believe in faith so much. It has gotten me this far, but there always is another side to a story. Well as far as yet another harrowing experience in the book of life for me, it was an eventfilled one. Heres how it started.... we flew out with Brass Monkey playing thanks to Holli and her family and AliAliAli's picture was about to fly off when i had some surgical tape in a bag and i retaped it..Whew! That picture means so much too me. She is a cute girl, and i want all of te cute girls and boys back home to know that we are fighting so that they can grow up without fear. I want them all to fear nothing. Please please please please dont teach your kids to be scared of things. Fear is what fuels these dummies over here. They live and strive on fear. Fear to keep people from working or going to school or just having a normal life. So as Brass Monkey was ending and reality set in. It set in when i remembered that i was gonna be lowered to the ground in a remote area of iraq to meet up with some Navy Seals who lost a Forward Air Controller to non hostile gun fire a few days ago. Now Non-hostile gun fire means usually or techinally suicide or accidental death. Anyhow, I was lowered with another Combat Controller and a PJ about 2 and a half miles from the Seals. We made radio contact with them as Cap and the crew were leaving. I was no longer safe. Well not safe within the helo. The ground is a dangerous place in iraq. YOu have Vehicle-Borned Improvised Explosive devices, snipers, dead animals packedd with explosives, "stalled or broken down cars" packed with explosives, and hell the list goes on. Well we went under the cover of darkness which is a help. I often wonder if the same moon that i looked at on this beautiful night is the same moon and stars that you guys look at night. So we move stealth like. I remember that this is my real job. A combat controller that works on the ground with special forces. Here i am this skinny kid from Texas that wanted to join special ops because of the girls, and now ive grown up and im not a father nor am i married. So WTF was i thinking back then at 17. I guess i was thinking like a 17 year old is supposed to think. Shit i dunno. So as we are moving slow but steady, fast but cautious, we spot three iraqis kids playing. We see them with night vison goggles on. This is a red flag. Normal muslim kids playing in the wee hours of the night isnt something that you see. I radioed using my throat and a special device via special ops to the other guys who were spread out about 50ish yards away from me that this wasnt right and we came to a halt. As the guy with the most stripes and seniority, i make the call to halt. Ya know when you have other peoples lives on the line you have to make the right choice. Damn now i see where CAP comes in being a hard ass. We halt for maybe 30 seconds in this deslote area of iraq...the country if you will. There are no sirens, or bridges or city life this is country iraq. I know that someone heard that helo, and they had to have radioed to our area to be on the look out for americans. I know it. I tell everyone to check there weapons and we wait. Now at 96 seconds of being in the same place i know that if they know that we are here they are getting ready and i know that it will be more than three guys or girls or children or animals waiting to do us harm. I tell the CCT(stone) to get on his radio and call for a bird in the sky. He radioes back that we dont have a threat. I tell him to fucking do it! He does and we find that the nearest bird(jet) is the Navy guys and they are about 11 minutes away. CAP is gone, but this really wasnt a job for that type of aircraft, but he would have done it. I tell the guys that we will end radio contact unless neccesary and we to proceed to the next point via the mission. They do now this jet is 10 mins and 20ish seconds away. Then Boom! A mortar goes off. A SHREEK then Boom! another one...well so much for a suprise attack!I realize that what ever smart guy back at base(this is why i dont want to be a officer) put our drop point right in the bed of enemy when we should have been outside of the enemy with a viewpoint of them. FUCK! I break radio silence and tell the guys that the mission is aborted and i made radio contact back to base and i let them know of the error. I knew it was the asshole army guy that was fresh out of westpoint! What a fucking dummy. Then another Mortar...this time closer. Stone wants to return fire but i tell him to hold on because of the tracer rounds that will come out and light illuminates whenever you fire a weapon. Then Boom! from 40 yards away. We all keep our composure and move to a safer loc. We trek up a hill and we see the enemy. Theres at least 20 of them.. running around like a chicken with there heads cut off! They are firing in an area that they think we are in, and stone takes his handgun, and i tell him to put that away. I inform him that we are very very very far away but we are close. Not close enough to do any damage with a handgun. Now realizing that we must fight our way through with 8+ minutes until the nearest help comes we spread out and get in defensive positions and decide to fight for our lives. So i fire the first shot and i tell the guys before the shot is fired that we have limited ammo and that we need to perserve it. Via night vison i fire the first shot...a person falls. They drag him away, and the guy to the right falls. Someone else shot the guy who was dragging the wounded. 7 minutes and counting. Stone puts out a call to the pilots to cut all COM until they are within the strike zone. I know that they were flying at supersonic speed. Burning fuel and costing tax payers a bunch. I know someo f you my ask how can you think of that in a time like this but i did. So we continue to fire and the fire back with heavy artillery and we fire back. Then someone has a customized russian made weapon(which i will not name due to securtiy reasons) that they roll out and begin to chop down everything within a 120 yard radius. I duck and listen as the bullets and trees and dirt and rocks ignite sparks. At least 1000+ rounds were fired from various locations and we just hunkered down. Shit was falling on me and the bullets kept coming. I tried to curl up in a ball and i just took it. After they ran out of ammo or they tried to restock everyone let everyone know that they were ok and here we are 4+ mins until its time and i take precison shots at these guys and we are running low. The numbers of insurgents are mounting fast. They are growing. The more we will the more they mulitply. I quickly realize that this was a t raining camp maybe. 2+ mins left and we are continuing to take strategic shots and we get radio contact that says they are on the way. Then I tell smoke to gather the coordinates quick fast and in a hurry and i tell him to call in the airstrike on our own position. This is the worst call to make. For a combat controller to call a airstriike outside of the comfort zone says alot. Hell this pilot asked that we repeat this request 4 times. im sure he didnt want to be a friendly fire story back home. We told him and we continued to fire on the enemy until i heard the roar. The song of the engines coming to our rescue. Stone called in the coordinates we took cover and they bombed the dog shit out of the enemy. All killed, no living, woman..children...and bastards dead. The area smokes. The back of the Pjs uniform is singed. We trek on and view the carcass of the dead. We praise the Navy guy for his expertise..he flies off, and we haul it too the army guys who cant belive that we are alive and we call in air strikes for them and evac a wounded solider and make it back to base camp. I checked my weapon and my handgun had one clip left and my main weapon had only 7 bullets left. Damn i needa get out of here ...even if its only for a little while... i hope that this guy will be punished for what he has done...prolyl not but i can hope...

nite

CAP and the Person who helped him get me wet..among other things

Hi guys

I hope everything is ok. I guess i decided to tell you guys that im ok and i usually post more, but i just havent. Hmm where do i start. Lets see there was someone that convinced CAP that they should all yell while i was sleeping and the throw ice cold water on me. Oh payback will be sweet!
Also, i was supposed to be coming home(to the USA) but Wilma has put a hold to that, and i will no longer be coming home by the first. When i found out, it was by an officer who chose to laugh at the situation while i stood at attention. I also flew out today and saw the bodies of american soliders dead after a roadside bomb. I even heard that one guy was going home in a week, and he will never know his son who was born yesterday. Sometimes things happen. Family can either help you or hurt you. They can make this experience as pleasant as possible, or they can make it worse than it is...when that happens its really bad. A guy over here that had divorce papers sent to him decided that he was through feeling sorry and saying what if. He has been better ok and then a twist of events happend. His ex wife who sent him papers over here is now jobless because she left there home for some other guy and now it didnt work. Hes coming home to no home but hes home and now she wants him back. That just pissed him off. We are always be at war...war with ourselves over...just treating people humanely.

I also got a email from another Combat Controller in afghanistan and he was telling me that a embedded reporter.....sigh...they are just dummies... caught video of this unit burning dead afghani corpses and using psychological warfare to bring the enemy out. Now the reason for burning them was because they enemy decided to kill themselves but slowly. They infected themselves with a contagious substance that was deadly so they had to burn them after they were killed. Hey you do what you gotta do to serve. The motto for the pjs is so that others may live. Well you do what you gotta do to live. So here we have the reporter from Australia who blasted the US Forces for this and now he has made alot of other people hate America. Reporters arent worth shit. They have really opened my eyes. You have about 1% of them that are good. The rest of them are useless. They keep corruption within the world going on a daily basis. Everyone from Bill O'reilly @ Foxnews(Al Jazeera of America) to this Australian asshole who would beg a plead for the same guys that he put at risk by taping this to come and save his ass if he were kidnapped. Kinda like biting the hand that feeds you dont ya think?

Follow Up To my Post

Ok I have rested a little bit....

Let me say this... I did not and i wont back down on my post, but i must clear some people who think that this post was directed at them. For starters this post was not directed at any bloggers whom ive never laid eyes on. I must apologize to the people whom ive never met for thinking that i was tearing them a new asshole. I am a very open and honest person, and i dont name names, but this one is due. I woke up scratching and yawning but very very very much happy that my body wasnt wearing down. I happy that we arent flying for the next few hours due to mat. checks. Back to the previous post though... I didnt mean that post for anyone on here other than my half sister. My sister and I dont get along that well. She thinks that i should be a lawyer or a doctor or snobbish SOB, and thats not me. She thinks that i should have been in 4H instead of playing basketball. She thinks that i should have went to Harvard as she did instead of LSU. She doesnt think that i shouldnt drink beer or help inner city kids.. I should just write them a check every year and say that justice has been served. Well yes we butt heads 99% of the time, and my sister really doesnt care about me she just communicates with me to "appear" as if she loves me so much, but she really doesnt. I know people think that i am talking bad about my half sister, but im not. She is what she is. She is a fucking rude, snobbish, selfish and thoughtless woman who only does things for the TV cameras or for the newspapers or for some gleam and glamour. For example she left me a email and said that Hurricane Katrina was good because it would make all the poor people get off there asses and get a job. Or That Katrina was good because she gets tired of taking care of old people that she doesnt know. RUDE!!! My sister has all of the money and the fast cars and the big house with a marble staircase and a elevator in the house and a plasma tv in the bathroom and one in the closet, and thats great. But it doesnt make a person who they are. Well there was a series of events that led up to this explosion..if you will of a post that i wrote. Here they are... first of all, i dont take anything from my siste because i dont want to owe her shit and her money is no good to me. I dont ride in her car, stay in her house, eat her food, or do anything. I love her, but i dont associate with her like that. She asked me awhile back if she could send a fedex shipment to Ramstein Air Base in Germany Attn: To me for enough goodies for over 300 military personel and civilians. I told her no, and i have my reasons.
1. She is not gonna get media fame and glory for sending a shipment when we have soldiers,airmen,sailors and marines dying every single say over here.
2. When someone sends something(especially to me and my buds) i would like to at least think that it is from the heart, not because you "feel" you have to or you have some hidden agenda.
3. I hate it when she thinks that she can just whip out her check book and just solve a problem. SORRY! It doesnt work like that.

So i told her no, and she got mad and hysterical and said some pretty hateful things that inculded death in them via email and i didnt hear from her for a week or so. Now i know that i talk to some of you guys regularly, and i havent mentioned this to you. Well now you know, me and my half-sister are at odds over life and the way that it should be lived. Well she decides to email me and she wants to act as if nothing happened. I still remmeber of course, but she has selective amnesia and she has forgotten already. She proceeds to ask me how things are over here, and im short with her and i reply that things are deadly as you wanted. She never said that she was sorry for saying what she said, she continued on as if i didnt exsist. She came back to her usual self and she she sent another email and she stated that her kids asked about me and she shunned them for admiring a military robot. I was still passive at this point and she sent another email telling me that it was hard work worrying about me and it costed her money and time and it would be easier to either have me home or in a casket rather than worry about me everyday. Thats when i flipped and told her to kiss my fucking ass and i told her to go and fuck herself. I told her that she didnt even have to worry about me at all. Worrying isnt about what you can achieve from it. Worry is actually just caring about someone. Thats love. When you worry you love someone. It doesnt matter about anything else. Hell if i got shot down tomorrow and was killed, im sure that alot of you couldnt make it to the funeral, but you would be hurt. Its because you care. Everyday that i climb into a helo or a HUMMVV theres a 99% chance that i wont make it. I have made it this far and im gonna come home. I have alot too live for, and being a snob isnt part of my life. I like people and i dont care if they are gay or straight..white or black or iraqi or sunni or shiaite or kurd. I Dont care. I love people as humans. I think as a human race, we have gotten away from that. We have gotten away from just caring for people. People are people. Love is Love and Worrying means that you love people. It doesnt have to be the mushy i wanna screw yo usilly love, it could be the i love you as a friend love..
To my sister who reads this blog and critzes everyone about what they say..... God has given you everything that you want, and in the blink of an eye, everything could be taken away! I love you, but you need a reality check. I love everyone..even the guy who gets gunned down by a .50 cal.

To the people who thought that this was intended for them...
It wasnt intended for you in any shape form or fashion. Alot of you guys ask me how i do this, and i nreality i do this with your help. I blog everyday and you give me word of encouragement with each and every keystroke upon your keyboard. You girls are the true warriors. You are single mothers, over achievers, lovely kind hearted people. I thank you for that. There are some people over here who dont have anyone. I have you if i dont have anyone else. I miss you and i will pray for you everyday. Remember that if you think that yo uhave it bad, just think about someone else. I love you all and please remmeber that this wasnt meant for you..

Love ya..
bye

Worrying and Blogging...

Heya guys how are you..

I hope things are great with you guys and im glad that you got a kick out of the period thing.PUKE! Anyhow it is yet another day and i have been literally running on zero sleep. I am glad for sleep deprivation training because it is paying off now. I would like to thank everyone for just listening to me when i write, but i must tell you that i am highly pissed off at a email that i got. Well let me back up.... someone here(some ppl dont respond on the blog, some just email me) has asked me some unclassified questions about the things that go on in iraq and if im ok or not or what im gonna do in iraq on this day or that day. Now most of you guys should know that i tell it like it is whether its good bad or ugly. Well when this person asked me if things were ok or not in iraq, i was honest. Ya know every day isnt a funny day here in iraq. There is death, destruction, choas, fighting, stealing, raping, robbing, kidnapping, murder...hell iraq is no paradise so i feel that whenever you ask someone how are they doing or if they are ok, you should be prepared for the answer. The answer may be pretty or it may not. Well anyway when this person asked me if things were ok, i was honest and i told them that it wasnt. I have been up every 3-4 hours on the regular and its taking a toll on my body. I did not start this blog to have you guys worry about me or cry or to make your hearts melt when i write something. I am a real person, and if you met me in person, i would be the same way. Now i have to be honest and tell you that it pisses me off to no fucking end that i get a email saying that this person cannot continue to worry about me and the guys over here in iraq and i took it as if it was my fault? Ya know that not only hurts, but it pisses me of and angers me. I started this blog not knowing anyone, and i didnt do it for a fan base. If that was the case then i would have more and more people on this blog, and i dont. Hell i worry about mamma, erin,Haley,Cassey, Suz.. Shit i worry about you guys everyday. But i dont think of it as a burden to have to worry about you guys. My heart aches when things may be wrong with you or your family. Just because im over here in iraq riding on a helo and shooting everday doesnt mean that i dont have compassion! Shit when i read that erin was selling her house and she hoped that someone buy it i said a little prayer as well, or i pray that SUZ's illness doesnt get the best of her or that Haley wont drink and drive when she parties. That is not a burden to me. If i left any of you guys out then its not on purpose, im dead tired so sorry. But for someone to tell me that it really pissed me off. So i have decided not to blog for awhile and being that i have my own personal govt computer, im gonna leave it with Mac when i make it to my next FOB. I guess i should make this clear that im not saying this for you guys to worry about me. Hell i have enough ppl back home in my family going nutz because of this situation in iraq. I have a grandmother that stays glued to the TV hopeing that im not the next U.S. solider killed in iraq by a roadside bomb or shot out of the sky. everytime that i call her, she cries and cries and cries and i cant even hear what she is saying. After i get off the phone with her, my family tells me that her blood pressure goes through the roof and she is just sick for days after i talk to her. Worrying shouldnt be a burden to anyone if you care about them, not for who they are, but just to care for people as human beings. Shit i worry about all of the women over here because they are treated so bad. I dont do it for a award or a medal. I do it because thats the kidna person i am. Ive talked it over with CAP and the crew and they stand behind me when i write this. I will be online later on to view the comments and emails and then i will post again and who knows i may stay away from blogging for a day two days maybe a week or a month! I love all of you guys and when i decide to blog again i will let you know. Hell i dunno.... maybe i need some sleep and maybe i wont stop blogging at all.. i will be back on after i get some much needed rest

Love you guys

Period

Ok,

this is a post that is out of the ordinary. I was talking to someone today and three women have thought that i should know about there menstrual cycles and periods and ugghhhh that stuff is just sicko! I mean the word period used in that term just freaks me out beyond repair! I was tortured as a teen with tampons and maxipads(which i am deathly afriad of). I was about 15 or 16ish and my 4 female cousins decided to put over 48 maxi pads on my favorite couch and on my bed(unused still in the wrapper) becuase they knew my hatred for the pad! Sigh...is this a common thing nowadays to say geez im having a shiity day... I am on my period? PUKE!!!
I had a gf once and she needed me to go to the store for those things, and i paid a kid 20 bucks to go into the store and buy them and quad wrap them in plastic and then put it in a paper bag!

This is no laughing matter...so then CAP comes in and tells me that periods arent as bad as they seem and you just have to go and get the tampon thingys and its part of being a good man. Well i know that im a good man, but i cant do the tampon thingy.

I
I can do everything in the world but touch a tampon or think about blood gushing like niagra falls from a woman. I am however open to the biology of the period if someone has some insight. Please help me with my fear and yes laugh if you must. I have been laughed at all day

Sandstorms yet again

Hey guys...sandstorms prevented us yet again from pounding these guys like i thought that we should have. Today was a day that i wanted to get in there and really give them a run for there money. I found out today that Abdullah(a local kid) was shot for proctecting his sister from being raped by the insurgents. He was the kid that some of you guys sent gifts too and even a walk man portable cd player in which he walked around and displayed as if it was gold or something. He was a sweet kid. He used to talk with us via an interpretor and he wanted to be the first iraqi king crab fisherman. Now why he wanted to do that, i dont know. He was advid about it. I gave him crab fishing books and pictures, and a navy intrepretor wrote down a 200 page book in his language so that he could read about the crab. Dammit! I usually check on him at least every other day or so and today i didnt. If i would have checked on him, maybe he wouldnt have been in the situation that he was in. His father was killed in front of him execution style by the insurgents and he had a very very distasteful attitude for the insurgents in iraq. HE was like the Malcom X of Iraq. Ive seen him walk up to known insurgents and say there he is there he is. He fought and spit on them. He was very vocal but young. He liked rap music and he liked Garth Brooks. What a mix. He liked snickers and M&Ms. We gave his family alot of money to help them out after his dad died. Dammit Shit Hell Dam Fuck. I dont really care about the insurgents being killed but kids and innocent people really get to me. We are gonna find out who was behind this indirectly and i hope that...well i will be silent about that. Justice will prevail! The last thing that he told me was that his sister said that i was Tall Dark & Handsome. He told me that he wanted to be tall dark and handsome when he grew up. He respected me, and i told him that he had to be low key, but he said that his dad wouldnt want him to be. He was the true muslim. He followed the book like it was supposed to be followed. He was respectful, loving, caring and one of those families that had close ties to Saddam Hussien. His father was electrocuted by Saddam and his thugs. His dad was one of the lucky ones. I know that he didnt have any fear, but maybe if i would have just....hell i dont know. I feel like i should have done something. Shit. There isnt a thing that can be done. Its done, its over with...its gone and it can never be taken away. I dont think that i can even face his mother and sister again. I cant believe it. This country is about the most unstable damn place that i have ever been. I have been working in the inner city back home all over the USA and hell its nothing like this. I was able to talk to some people that work in the inner city. I have news yet again. There was a guy by the name of Smoke. Smoke was a 22 year old kid who was a drug seller. A nickel and dime kind of drug dealer if you will. Smoke always told me that he was gonna leave drug dealing alone and get his GED and go to college, but not today...maybe tomorrow Hawk. Thats what he would always say. Well he bit the bullet a few days ago. He and his mom were walking down the street and some old enemy shot him in the head and shot his mother in neck. Damn. 23 years old and his life is snuffed out behind drugs. This kid could run up and down a basketball court faster than you could blink your eye. Now his mom has a son that is dead. He didnt die on the spot, he died about 5pm CST but his mother saw him when he died. Real enemies are the ones over here. There are no bad asses or gangsters in the USA. The real fucking killers are these fools over here. Life can be tough sometimes. Mac toldme that i should cry and maybe i would feel better, but im not the one who cries. So also while we were sitting here eating beef jerky and just talking, here comes yet another yell for mail. So my buddies get up and beckon me to come with them and i do, and i'll be a motherfucker. ya know some women are just fucking cruel. One of my buddies gets a picture of his dog that he thought was sold(because of his wifes cruel intentions was not in fact sold, but was still alive and at home) dead(according to the picture with blood around his fur) This was obviously disturbing, and i looked at the "dead dogs" photos over and over and over again while sipping on some soup in a cup and i realized that this could not be true. So i had a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend that new a police officer to go to the house a on a routine patrol, and there was lucky healthy and as undead as possible. People can be so cruel...*shakes head* Why go through the trouble. As for me in iraq, i am ok. Im waiting on the sandstorm to blow over and well ill be at it again. I have just been in one of those moods. Ya know..just a i could have been more productive in my day mood. I have just been really short with people today and its not that i dont care, its that i sit here and ponder about people and i think about situations and ya know.....well....shit aint like it used to be. I guess you only have one chance and one opportunity to say what you mean to people like me, and there are certain people back home that wanna hold things in and not say what you mean. Shit...you could be gone in a second and never have the chance to say what you wanted...i just think that it is crazy that people just take chances. Why deal drugs? Why kill a kid? Why rape? Why send a photo of a dog tat you put make up on a shit to make look dead when he isnt? Why cheat...why lie? Hell i guess we could all ask why o why o why huh. Here i am in iraq, getting shot at and gettting rpgs fired at me and people have the spare time to make dogs appear as if they were dead? Oh and i just got a follow up email and the kid who shot smoke was only 19. So here we have a 23 year old dead, a 40+ year old wounded, and a 19 year old held with charges of murder and attempted murder. I am sure that this guy would love to have that day taken back. Once you pull the trigger that is it. I know i do it on a daily basis. I pull the triigger and before i can blink my eye i see someone fall. I instantly realize that since i am a good shot that someone has lost a sister, mother, brother, cousin, uncle, aunt, dad. I cant take it back nor am i proud of it, but war is war nomatter the reason or its validity. Well i think i have bored you guys enough... So i will end it here

gotta fly

New Idea!

Heya guys...

I have a new idea.. I would like to talk to all of you guys at the same time, and i have found out a way.. I would like all of you guys to download yahoo messenger @ www.yahoo.com

After that i will be able to set up a chat room and i have a brand new mic. So we will all be able to talk and chat! So i hope that you all can show up! Once you have yahoo messenger downloaded, i will set up a private chat room and we will all join. I would like to thank all of you guys for being there for someone that you dont even know...that can be hard at times. Once you have it done, you can email me at af879@yahoo.com


I hope to have at least someone attend. It would make me very very very very happy if you guys could attend. I would like to do it about 4pm Central time. I will continue to check back.

Also i got Hollis package in the mail. Now im not a mushy kinda guy, but i almost shed a tear. I had pictures from ALi and her friends that will go up in the bird now, i have beef jerky, salsa, baby wipes, dvds...I feel really special.. So special thanks to Holli!

Oh and Mac...thanks for sending me damn subway wrappers with no sandwhich in them..that was so cruel! :D

For you guys who dont know who mac is, mac is the chic who posts my posts for me if i cant make it to a computer... Mac is in the lead as far as pranks go, but when i see her again she will pay!!!

As for pranks...let me tell you what one marine did to another... He put ex lax in his coffee..lmfao

Now if that wasnt the funniest damn thing ever... the guy stayed on the crapper for over an hour!

Well i gotta go..hope you download messenger and pic a screenname..

see ya

Crazy!!!

Hey guys,

I am still here in iraq, and well now the Sunni Iraqis want to prevent there own people from voting, and if they try to vote then the blow the voters up....sigh! These were the same dummies who screamed, bitched and cried about a change! Anyhow, i was up in the helo today(less the 19 y/o who will face criminal charges for shooting himself in the gut) and Cap decided to play Dora the Explorer..who the hell chose that one? And it sounded like a kids song or something...There were alot of tinky winky words and stuff :/ Anyhow... we circled alot of enemy hot spots and saw very minimul action...then we hit the electricty grids and stations and jackpot! The turned and saw us and one guy decides to raise a RPG at us and i unloaded on everyone there including the newly rebuilt electricty grids and well my actions caused a blackout in some areas. I didnt feel bad because the iraqis are use to the dark..i know that is mean, but hey i hate rpgs. This guy was able to get the rpg off before we were able to cut them down! I know it sounds bad when you say cut them down, but thats what happened. I also almost lost my life today(not that i dont do that everyday) because my mind was on a certain woman & her situation at home with her baby and hell i dont know... i just couldnt stop thinking about it. Well heres what happened. Usually when i load up on the helo, i strap in the helo and that way i can move around and if the pilots make sudden abrupt moves or i have to hoist someone up im strapped in case we make sudden moves. Well i wasnt strapped in, and i had to lean out of the helo and they thought they saw more insurgents and he veered up and out left and there i went. When it happened i knew that i was going over, but luckily my buddy saved my ass and caught me before i was out of arms length. They slowed the flight and they helped to pull me back up to safety. Cap told me that i was tired of riding with them so i decided to find another way home! That was the first time in over six and a half years riding professionally that i have made a costly mistake. Usually i am able to check that stuff and still think about situations back home. I hated it that i wasnt able to know what was going on at home with certain people and there babies. I will say however that dangling from your legs out of a pavehawk helo is not fun at all! Well i gotta get some nasty baked fish(throw up) i hate fish!

See ya later

:D

Wow... im here in iraq and a sandstorm is and has caused trouble for fly boys in this area.
It has been pretty crazy here the last couple of days. The violence has escalated and this constitution bullshit can go to hell! Yea i know that this is supposed to make us go home faster, but ya know it doesnt seem to be happening. I also ran across some SPecial Ops guys that have flew over here from the USA, and they are gonna do a mission and go back to the states! Why couldnt i be on that misson. Damn! I want some damn Chik Fil A. I want a kids meal 6 pack with a coke:/

I miss my kids that i play with in the inner city and the people that i help in the inner city. Ya know if you guys havent had the chance to volunteer in the inner city or the poor neighborhoods, i encourage you to do so. I remember a week or so before i left, i left a lady and a family who used to prostitute there young 12 year old daughters for drugs and money. I had a email just a minute ago that stated that the mom was clean and the daughter wasnt doing that anymore and that she had been tested for all STds and came back clean! I miss that...
Well i gotta head to a briefing... see ya

Posting Again/Lust/Iraq

Hey guys, it is about 9am here in iraq, and i guess i should be sleeping, but im not. I am sitting here typing to you guys. Wow..my actual bath was great! It took alot of FOB hopping, but i did it. So now im here in iraq and we are getting ready to fly out again. The 19 y/o is with us again for nothing more than experience(according to the Army) . We prepare to head out and he asks me the same question again... What if i dont make it on this current mission HAwk? I reply..Well if you dont, you will get sht out of the sky, have your life flash before your eyes and burst into flames and die before the enemy gets you if you are lucky! Well there goes my sick and twisted humor again before take off. We life off with the wind blowing harder than normal with some guy by the name of Pink Flooyd.. :/ It was a weird song, but hey it worked. So we are set to fly out and patrol a insurgent hot spot along with the USMC! We make it there, CAP decides to fire his rounds off..we hit alot of insurgent buildings, the Maj flies out of nowhere with percison guidided ammo and we provide security until we can leave out. Well upon leaving out , we see thew 19 y/o who is yet devasted again. I dont think he is cut out out for special operations. Nope i dont think he will make it much longer... well thats all that i can write now



As far as Lust goes, there is a lady who has a kid(hey i love kids so all you bloggers dont hold it against me) and i think she is cool. She is back in the states and i dont think it is lust, but i sure love the way she makes me feel. I have talked to her on more than one occassion for quite a long time. I have realized by talking to her that all women arent bad after all..so mystery woman out there, thanks for everything..even though you dont know who you are. I will post again


bye

garden tub

Hey guys, i cant tell you how, but i am in iraq safe and i actually had the opportunity to talk to someone really special, and well i almost got mushy with that person until i decided that i should hols odd. Anyhow, i got into the tub and i "marinated" for quite a bit. It has been a long time since i had running hot water to soak in. Well See ya later

Homicide Bomber

Hey guys how are you!

Yes, my post says homicide bomber...

This is a post that i would like everyone if they have children(teens) or people that are unappreciative to read this(even if you have to read it out loud to them). Well Let me rewind a little bit. I talked to my parents this morning, and i talked to Holli for like an hour while doing paperwork, and we kinda just talked about random stuff, and just to let you women bloggers know... i think that it is pretty messed up that you all are gonna meet for a concert, but noone wants to fly to iraq to see me :D Anyway..sorry for the bas joke, but after thati kinda just laounged around and laughed at the CAB(crazy asian boys-thats what they call themselves) who smacked the hell out of each other for pure pleasure and pain, and then we are notified that we need to fly out. Yep! Another mission... i knew that this one was gonna be intresting because..well.. i dont know how i know but i did! So as we are loading up, we are getting brieged and i figure out that we are gonna have a army ranger interpreter with us for a little bit. No biggie to me, but i hate it when new people come along because i trust my life within my crews hands, but not this young 19 year old kid! Anyhow, we roll out and we are all gonna get dropped off at a near by loc and we must travel to some wounded iraqis apparently caught in a roadside bomb. Im like great..im on the ground with unexploded ordiance everywhere. Well we fly up and today three doors down(one of my fav groups) is playing "away from the sun". So we fly and the 19yr army kid is baffled. Im sure he has heard so many stories about how air force ppl are sorry, and now he is about to risk his life! I slap him on the back and tell him that if he is blown up, he wont even feel a thing. Was that wrong? Apparently so. He is the first guy that pisses his pants on a helo that i have ever met. Literally. SO here we are in Iraq with a pissy ass interpertor who is gonna be on the ground with me. Have any of you guys smelled fresh fear piss? Yes i said fear piss. There is a difference between piss and fear piss! I wont go into that, because some of you guys have weak stomachs.. Anyhoo i laugh at this guy right in his face because he is scared and pissy, and CaP lets him know that he will be ok and that even though im crying laughing overe here that im the good guy, and iwont let anything happen to him. I think at this point he thought for once that he was on a death mission. LOL. In its own sick twisted fucked up kinda way, this was funny! SO we are about 1.5 miles away from are drop loc, and i can see the fear within his eyes. I assure him that today, he will come back within one piece. Then he asks me about tomorrow, and i told him to worry about tomorrow when it gets here. So we are 500 yards away from being dropped off in bfei(bum fuck egypt iraq) and we fast rope it down to the ground. Whew.. we all make it safe. Now we have to haul it to the wounded with night vision goggles on and alot of medical supplies and guns. Now i am no big guy! I am a lil skinny guy with alot of heart and will to make it out alive, and im proud of that, but a freakin heavy ass gun in iraq is crazy. So we make it on the ground..all in one piece and the helo flies away. When the helo flies away, you know that you are really alone in iraq. Hell i couldnt even hear a iraqi crickett rub its legs together...So we make it fast, but slow....cautious but stealth-like to the site of the wreckage in a remote part of iraq. Here i see a car thats blow to smitherines and the PJ and I look inside, and everyone is dead. A teenage kid(i presume by the bone structure) two adults and a infant. They are burnt beyond recognition. They are charred and stuck to the metal wires within there car. So i tell the 19 yo to come over here and look to see if any secondary devices are around. This was the first time that he had clearly seen death, and it was taking an effect on him. The smell of burning flesh is a distincnt smell that you will never foget. So i told him that there were no EOD(explosive Ordinace disposal) guys coming and if he set off a bomb, once again he wouldnt feel it if he triggered it. So he eased over and i made..forced him to touch a charred corpse. Now this wasnt cruel punishment..but a way to save our lives. SO he did..he threw up and continued. After we secured the car, we made it to the area around the car and here is the culprit. The hommicide bomber, and he is in rare form. He is half blown off with his guts hanging out and blood and his liver is severly damaged. He is shaking and shivering and bleeding from the mouth. HE is saying something in arabic and i cant understand what he is saying. SO i turn to the 19 y.o. and he throws up again. Then he starts to cry and lose it, and i grab him and tell him to FUCKING GET IT TOGETHER! He continues to cry, and i told him that if he didnt stop this shit that i would shoot him my fucking self... Well that just scared his pissy ass, and he told me what the Homicide Bomber said... Can you get this...the bomber was in so much pain that he wanted us to shoot him. I told the 19yo to tell him that we dont do that, and i told him to read the geneva convetions card back to the ass fuck who blew himself up and he did. To make this story short, the bomber bled to death and screamed until i had to put a mouthful of wet moisties in his mouth so that he wouldnt give away our position in the darkness... We got lifted back up and headed back "home". We made it back all safe and sound, and here i am posting...

P.S. The 19 year old thanked me afterward. He has been in the Shower for well over an hour. I knw he is trying to scubb himself clean, but it wont happen i dont care how long you stay in there!

For all of you teens and unappreciative people... you should stop and think that life could be gone in a minute! Dont argue with your parents, and dont be ungrateful...be thankful for what you have. You could be the family who was in that car. They were innocent, and they died a violent horrible death. They were burned alive! Please live life to the fullest...

see ya

Update/Videos

Heya guys,

I am posting you today...the day that the iraqi sunnis rejected parts of the consitution.-.. they are keeping me from coming home soon. :/ I wish they could get it right! I finally got a email that stated that i got a package from Wendy Williams(talk show host..For CAP) and i got a package from the lovely Holli G. WOO HOO! I am awaiting the pictures from the camera phone that shows Holli and Faith's pic on a Tee Shirt! I dont know if that was supposed to be a suprise or not, but for all of you people that dont know, all of the women on my blog are HOT!!!!!!!!! There are at least 40 guys(literally) who want Holli, and i tell them that even if i die in Iraq, they cant have her. Is that over protective, or is that just being a man. I mean.. they want mamma( guys) haley(about guys)Cassey(about)sto sto(about )(erin(about )...amber(about ) and the list goes on. I told all of the military guys that if they post on any of you guys blogs that they will have to deal with me....! IS that over-protective? Am i a hog?

Man today i risked my life yet again!
There was a Marine who was wounded outside of the battlezone, and i decided to suggest that i be lowered with a PJ(which u will see on a video in about a week) to rescue this Marine who was critacally wounded. Now this was foolish, but i guess we go to save the ppl that we dont know! I mean two lone Americans veruss all of damn me iraq! Man the things that i do! So we fast rope down with a CCT on the gunn on the helo and we fastrack it to the wounded Marine. Fighting Shit smelling streets, insurgents taking pot shots, and our own fire coming over our heads. We finally make it to the Marine, and hes in bad shape. His right arm is practially gone, and half his face looks like a pack of hamburger meat, but moving and bleeding. I assure him that he will be ok, and i really dont know if he will be ok or not! Then he proceeds to tell me that he cheated on his wife and has yet two fucking kids outside his marriage. Here i am in bumfuck egypt with a guy thats alive and blown to smitherines, and he wants to let his skeletons out of the closet with me. Yall know i hate cheaters... i didnt want him to die, but damn his suffering was nothing close to the amout of suffering that his wife will go through. Maybe Iraq will teach his ass not to cheat!
But is that a cruel punishment? Hell i dunno. All of these guys that have love, fuck it up, and here i am looking to be a good man and i have the short end of the stick!!! HEy i will posting a audio blog, so check it out

Videos

Hey guys, it was too hard to email you al of the videos, so i have decided to make a web page and post the videos on there. I should have it by 7pm CST. I will put the link on here when i finish. I am gonna go and take a much needed shower.

see ya

Safe & Sound

Hey guys,

I am here, safe and sound. We have been on a kick ass mission(s) for the past few days, and i didnt get the chance to post like i have been. It has been sleep, ride shoot...sleep, ride, shoot. I got a chance to call Holli(because most of you are married, and im not gonna be a home wrecker and call you, and to that crazy person...you gave me your phone number and it was to the Sperm Bank for Dogs..lol which was funny.. I wont reveal your identity) and that was just that. I felt really bad that you guys were worrying about me and Holli cried. I dont like it when women cry. :( I did however get a chance to talk to ALiALiALi and Sto Sto. Now lets talk about Sto Sto for a min. I think she is cool and crazy(in a good way). I think she would be the type of person to laugh at you if you tripped and fell after asking you if you were ok. I only can gather this because she laughed at her sister when Faith started using crayons as a drawing board on her mommys walls. Now i feel the need to go to Holli's house and clean all of her walls to military standards.

Also, alot of enemy fighters have been fleeing our power and might. Quite a few have been killed. Some middle eastern cultures just do things differntly, even if it means giving up their life. Well i gotta run..

Oh P.S. Email me and i will send you a pic of an angel that someone sent to me. :P

Kids&Women

HEy...


I am blogging yet again! I fucking hate rpgs, and guess what freakin three were fired at me. Thanks to our pilots, we made it to the ground safely this afternoon. My god...how much do we have to go through to actuallly gain a sense of normaalcy within this hellhole. As we are flying out, the CAP(read from prev posts) plays a song from a guy named Kem, or Kemi with a song a entitled I cant stop loving you..sigh.. what a song to think about. As i get about 10 feet i nthe air i start to wonder how and why i am actually here in iraq. This shit is bigger than Vietnam, and it means something. I had a sniper, which doesnt usually ride with us upon the helo, and he was hitting "targets while moving" and i thought that was impressive. I dunno...i love yall and i hope you guys can havea good day. I am dead tired im hittin the sack for a few

I Saw Another Stupid Episode Of Over There

Hey guys,....


I saw yet another stupid episode of "Over There". This time, there was a scene of a crazed medic, who goes crazy, becomes a hostage, and gets 3 people killed in the process. What the fuck are these hollywood assholes thinking. This really upsets me. Just as i am watching this from fucking Iraq, the insurgent fucks are gaining new ideas to try these dumb "hollywood tricks" on soliders over here. Jesus i wish that damn show would just go off. The only thing in the show that i agreed with is when there was guy over here that was being cheated on by his girlfriend at home. Now that one thing you guys can relate to, if you guys have forgotten. Btw that chic emailed me and stated that she wanted me to "consider" waiting on her when her boyfriend cheats on her again, and she is scared to post on the blog because i have a mob of angry women on here thats just waiting to eat her alive! HA! I never looked at you guys that way, but it was funny to read it! Hey if you can people...keep her cheating, lying, manipulating ass away as far as you can! If you ever see her post, please tear her a new asshole. Also, my squadron had the chance to come home for about three weeks, and we all decided to stay. Yea, it may sound crazy, but we are trying to leave this place. Also we launched a big time battle against the enemy the other day, and it was the first time in a long time that i actually saw kids get mowwed down by helo gunfire and .50 bullets. Sheesh.... its a shame when you have kids and women and children pointing guns at you. I mean i actually hesistated before i pulled the trigger for once(bad mistake) and had a quick flashback, but i resorted back to the same ole stay safe come back home routine. I rarely ever miss, and i know that out of 300 shots fired i made direct contact with 296 of them. Nothing to brag about, but something to think about. I am sitting here upon a helo, 1000+ enemy fucks are running around uncoordinated, and im trying to take care of them so that they wont take care of my buds;some that i know and some that i dont! We had few casualties which was good, but after awhile its like war is war is war is war is war. To actually pull the trigger on a .50 is a thing man/women. Once that trigger is pulled, there is no coming back. There is no... Im sory that bulllet wasnt meant for you. It done! Sealed. In the Bag. As i rode today, 4 members of my squad got served with divorce papers. How fucking sweet is that. Not only do you have to deal with iraq, but you get served papers for divorce while in iraq? Why is it that a lady/female cant have enough decency to just keep on cheating and making you feel as if you are king of the world, and divorce your ass when you get back home in once piece and take everything you have ever worked for? Is that so hard for a Solider/Airman/Seaman/Marine to ask for. You have to be the lowest scum on earth to do some stuff like that. I come to understand that people in general just dont care about the everyday well-being of people. Its sad that people can and will do certain things just to gain self-worth. Once you gain this self worth, who are you fooling? Who are you kidding? Its like you can lie to me, but you cant lie to god, so whats the use of lying? Its like my Buddy from 3 doors down says..... Im not trying to be somebody im just trying to be somebody else.. this life im living dont you know me . Why is it that people have to cheat? Why do kids have to pick up guns not knowing the consequences. I mean... If anyone is reading this, i want you guys to do a little assignment for me. I want you to go to your nearest shooting range and look at a .50 cal bullet. Look at the one for a hand gun, and magnify that bullet by 3.5 times and you know what im talking about. Or look on the net at a .50 bullet. Think about shooting a kid who can barely hold this gun up. I am more than your expert marksman, i am Hawk! Now im bragging, but i can shoot the knot off of your g-string that ties in the back without shooting you. I mean... i practice... I have to shooot from far far distances away, and when i ride in the Hmmv, I have to shoot up close and personal. BUt to actually see someones face when they are shot is a memory etched in my brain forever. After i nuetralize an enemy, i always say "forgive them lord for they know not what they do." I also ask forgive myself because i hate taking a life or contributing to taking a life. It is like a bottomless pit. Ya know you people out there in the world who have a good man or a a good woman, and you are fucking over them, STOP! If you wanna fuck over someone, come over here...theres plenty to go around. If i could have a good female companion while in iraq(with a 85% divorce/seperation rate) i think that i could function more. Its hard being lonely over here in Iraq. And just to set the record straight if any of you readers are sitting there with your husbands and wives, noooo im not asking your wife to leave you and come to me... :) I just want you to cherish what you have 100% EVERY DAY. I want a good woman sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo bad, but i keep geting the bad apples off the tree. For you people who have the good apples, keep em. I know that there are some good single apples on my blog today, and even though ONE of them may not wear matching bras and panties...hey shes still good! So cherish what you have. Every time that the helo comes up in the air, i never know what is gonna happen. The Enemy is fucking nuts! I heard of a story about a solider trying to have sex with a iraq girl, and she had razor blades in her vagina. :/ Luckilly, he didnt succeed, but man oh man oh man. I am not the "hey lets play with myself kinda guy", but i would versus being served razor blades in a cooch in iraq. I mean what is the world coming too? Who in there right mind would walk around like that? I just cant see non matching Haley doing that. Sorry for using you as an example, but whatever i think i write. Email me if yo uwant that ommitted. I mean i am sick(so the marines say). Me and my squad are gonna stay over here and pass up a invite to come home! The paperwork was submitted, and im sure it will be approved. The AF Joint Chiefs of Staff put in a word for us AF guys to come home for good, but we will wait a lil longer. There is alot of work to be done in this ravaged place. People are getting beheaded daily....soliders and airman are dying, and children are being put into situations in which they shouldnt! If you guys know of any single sexy women, pass em my way! I would write more, but my Lt. is gonna press send email if i write one more line....


bye

P.S. Thats all the letters and shit i get from you guys...thanks a bunch! Sto Sto tell AliAliAli i said hi! The next time i call Holli, im gonna tell her to call AliAliAli.. I wanna talk to her

...

An improvised explosive device killed a female Airman during a convoy mission supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom.Airman 1st Class Elizabeth Jacobson, 21, was providing convoy security Sept. 28 near Camp Bucca, Iraq, when the vehicle she was riding in was hit by an improvised explosive device. The Riviera Beach, Fla., native was assigned to the 17th Security Forces Squadron at Goodfellow Air Force Base, Texas. Airman Jacobson had been in the Air Force for two years and had been deployed to Iraq for more than three months. She is the first female Air Force Airman killed in the line of duty in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom.“She was an outstanding Airman who embraced life and took on all the challenges and responsibilities with extraordinary commitment to her country, her comrades and her family,” said Col. Scott Bethel, 17th Training Wing commander at Goodfellow.“Her dedication to the U.S. Air Force and serving her country was evident in all aspects of who this young lady was,” he said. “Team Goodfellow and the San Angelo community are deeply saddened by this tragic loss of one of our cherished family members,” Colonel Bethel said. “Our thoughts and prayers go out to her family during this difficult time. We ask that all Americans keep Airman Jacobson, her family and the men and women serving in the military, overseas and in the United States in their thoughts and prayers as they continue to keep America free.”



Hey guys, today is a bittersweet day today..


I fellow female airman has died in iraq a few days ago! This picture was sent to me and i posted it. I hate it when the cards fall like this...

Also i have a picture of me and a pic of my fellow airman.. a pilot that allowed me to take a pic in night vison equipment. Well i hope you like...

P.s. I am standing on a Wing.. I have yet to get clearance to post my up close and personal pictures online, but when i do i will try to post a good one if i find one